Let’s start with the rhubarb.

The first shoots came up really fast.  Woohoo!  Sadly, my rhubarb did not grow very tall.  It kept wilting in the sun, so my faithful Gardening Assistant, erected a very attractive rhubarb  shade from some wooden poles and an old bed-sheet.  It kept the rhubarb from getting sunstroke, but the stalks still wouldn’t grow tall.  The longest one is a little over 8″.  Kind of stumpy for rhubarb.

My dad grew rhubarb in the back garden when I was growing up.  You wouldn’t expect much success in London, but his rhubarb was perfect.  Three differences to consider:

1. There isn’t as much sun in London as the SF Bay Area and there are hard frosts in the winter.  I don’t like that, but rhubarb does.
2. Dad used some pieces of air-conditioning duct to surround the rhubarb and force it to grow tall.  I don’t have any.
3. There was a rag-and-bone man that regularly came past the house in a horse drawn cart.  Dad would run out and collect any droppings with a bucket and shovel.  He would then parade through the house before depositing his street gold on the rhubarb.  Just in case you think I grew up in the Victorian era, this was the early 70′s!  It should come as no surprise that there is no rag-and-bone man here in Silicon Valley – horse drawn or otherwise.

The rag-and-bone man looked just the way you would expect – old, wizened and kind of shabby.  His call was “Any old bone?”.  My dad would rush out the door with his bucket and shovel and … well, nuff said

Anywho, I digress …

It turns that that for good rhubarb, you mustn’t pick any for the first year   In the second year, you can only pull two stems per plant!  Thus I reverted to Plan B – find rhubarb in the supermarket and buy it.  Thus a pie is born, carefully crafted by my Gardening Assistant Chef.  The pie was made with only half a cup of sugar, as I like my pie to bite back.  Unfortunately, my Gardening Assistant Chef finds that too sour, so I am the only one left to eat it

Good rhubarb also requires a non-flowering plant.  Mine flowered.

The Sunflowers took about 10 days to sprout,  now look at them, tall but lacking flowers.

Hey, Rhubarb!  Get with the Sunflowers and stretch!

Hey, Sunflowers, did you hear that? The Rhubarb flowered!

Lisa.

When I lived in the UK, I went to the Royal Horticultural Society show aka the Chelsea Flower Show every year.  What fun!  There was me and a huge crowd of retirees … and nowhere to sit.  I got wise to this after several years of aching feet and heat headaches – the final straw came when I ended up in the first aid tent with heatstroke.  I invested in a rather grand folding seat. Not the clunky type you take on a camping trip, but a very light weight walking stick that unfurls into a chair with a back and arm rests and weighs less than 2lbs.

I triumphantly took it to the show following the heatstroke debacle feeling very pleased with myself.  I sat down by the bandstand to eat my lunch and rest in the shade.  There were many retirees circling, looking for a place to sit.  I smiled sweetly – yes, I can smile sweetly, believe it or not.  Eager to get back to the show, I stood up to pack my bag only to be knocked out of the way by an over-zealous retiree who was after my seat!

OZ Retiree: “Are you leaving?”

Me: “Yes”

OZ Retiree: “Great! I have been looking for a seat” <gloating, looks over at the other circling retirees>

Me: “You don’t understand, it is my seat” <quickly folds seat>

OZ Retiree: “Well, now it’s my seat!”  <looks mystified> “What happened to my seat?”

I scuttled off to the bulb tent without looking back!

Anywho, I digress …

On Sunday, I planted four rhubarb crowns.  Well, technically, I supervised the planting.  I have a bad back – digging is not good for it.  The next day the first shoot was visible and today it is over an inch tall – see image above.  Only 3 of the four have sprouted so far, but that’s not too shabby after 48 hours!

The news of my sunflowers is not so inspiring.  After 10 days I have nothing – no sprouts, no promising lumps in the soil.  Nothing.  My rhubarb only took 24 hours!  After years of growing Peonies in the UK, you would think I would have a little patience.

I have no great life lesson here.  Just wanted to let you know about my rhubarb success.  And after all, rhubarb is just a great word isn’t it?

Lisa.