Anywho, I digress …

Loosely based on what might have happened. Or not.

What would you do?

Posted by episode81 on August 31, 2009

Can I get a lift?

Have you seen my bull?

Odd stuff just seems to happen to me.

I am waiting in line at airport security and I see an Enigma.

I am driving down the motorway and I notice a white bull running down the hard shoulder … hotly pursued by a farmer wearing wellingtons and waving a pitch fork.  We slowed down in our red car (yikes!) and gave him a lift as the bull ran down the off ramp.  He had to keep the car door open as his pitch fork wouldn’t fit.  He took off over the fields and disappeared into the distance.  Never did find out if he caught up with his errant charge.

Anywho, I digress …

I was minding my own business at home, noodling about, when I couldn’t help overhearing my neighbor (retired, lives alone)  talking loudly to a young guy about magazine subscriptions.  My spidey sense went off.  It was chilling to hear him spin a yarn about an internship at the BBC in London, that he was hoping to take up,  if he could just raise the funds.  He apparently lived on the next street and would get more “points” if she paid cash.  I’d heard enough.  I called the police.  I didn’t have much info and I sounded like a nosy neighbor – no I can’t describe him,  no he hasn’t tried to sell me anything, I just overheard him talking to my neighbor.  I felt foolish.  The dispatcher said they would send a car to drive by “if one was available”.

I went back to listening.  It was then that he asked her if he could come inside to use her restroom.  He went inside.  I saw the police car drive by – at a fair clip.  I ran out the front door to flag him down (in my bare feet) only to see him zip round the corner!

I called the police again.  My heart was racing.  The Bad Guy was crossing the street, so I described him. “White guy, brown long sleeved top, khaki pants, short brown hair … and now he’s walking up my drive.”

I confess that my voice turned into a bit of a squeal at that point.  The dispatcher started talking on the radio to call the car back.  I said I would keep him busy, but I am really not very brave.

He spun the same yarn to me, with some added, unfortunate, flair.

Bad Guy: “Yes I have an internship with the BBC in London”

Me: “Really.  What are you going to do?” <heart pounding, trying to think of my next question to keep him busy>

BG: “I am going to be a sports correspondent.  You know soccer, cricket, lacrosse” <takes a step back, smiling>

Me: “Lacrosse? Really? On the BBC?” <smiling, amused even, not worried… almost nobody plays Lacrosse in the UK, and I have never seen it on the TV in the UK! Liar, liar, pants on fire!>

Then the police car arrived.  Then a second.  Shortly followed by a third … and a fourth.  The fifth took a bit longer.

Turns out he has a criminal record – theft, scams, etc.  I really have great hearing 😉  One of the police stayed behind to return the checks to the BG’s  lucky “sponsors”.

All in a days work.


5 Responses to “What would you do?”

  1. Weldon said

    Nice read Lisa,

    Tonight on the way home in the van, I turned the corner and a skunk suddenly appeared and raised his tail to spray, I pushed the gas peddle to the floor and escaped to Burlingame. Be careful when you go out at night for a walk.

    Bub de Bub

  2. thedigitalfarmer said

    Lisa, can you tell me where you found the farmer image. Do you know who owns it? dj, thedigitalfarmer

  3. Lisa said

    If you click on the image, you will be taken to the site where the image appears. The image is on this page –


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